The ISIHAC
Late Arrivals Page - Letter P

Last Updated
17 Feb 2013


Balls:

Painters' Ball Parliamentary Ball
Pensioners' Ball Pharmacists' Ball
Photographers' Ball Plumbers' Ball
Policemen's Ball Politicians' Ball
Publicans' Ball


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Painters' Ball

From France - Mr & Mrs Lautrec, & their incontinent son 24 Nov 1990
There's Van Gogh's son, Flowers, & his pal, Ette, & his pig, Ment 24 Nov 1990
Rory Bremner impersonating Alain Delors - he's a French Impressionist, and there's Jason Donovan standing like a piece of wood - he's a Post Impressionist 24 Nov 1990
A reminder that we'll be drawing the Raphael shortly, but now it's cabaret time (we're getting a feeling of Degas-vous). It's a very spectacular cabaret tonight - we've got Easel Kniesel, who's going to jump over 12 motor Caravaggios 24 Nov 1990
Here's Francis Bacon - I thought he was Jewish, but no, he's Goya 24 Nov 1990
Here's Goya, the famous war artist, and over there is Oliver Reed, the famous...Pissarro 24 Nov 1990
Here's Joan Rivers - Ooh, sorry Joan - don't want to Burne-Jones dress 24 Nov 1990
And here comes William Morris, & his son, Morris Minor 24 Nov 1990
There on the arm of Botticelli - Bertha Venus, and as usual, he's come without any Monet 24 Nov 1990
And here's Ludwig Van Beethoven - he's so deaf, he thinks he's a painter 24 Nov 1990
And a funny joke - How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? - Fish 24 Nov 1990
There's Roger Whittaker & his mum - the Whistler's Mother. Watteau, Roger! 24 Nov 1990
Just pouring a drink for this person who's in the police - Constable, Say when! 24 Nov 1990
And put your hands together for Pablo Here's mud in your ear Picasso. He was burgled last night - managed to do a drawing of the burglars - the next day the police arrested two horses & a sardine! 24 Nov 1990
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Parliamentary Ball

Fresh from the Party Conference, Mr & Mrs Dingovation, & their son, Stan Bradford
20 May 2002
From Holland, Mr & Mrs Ustshutupmomowlam, & their son, Wim Bradford
20 May 2002
Mr & Mrs Riculturalpolicy, & their wayward daughter, 'common' Aggie Bradford
20 May 2002
Mr & Mrs Youtakethisthousandquidandaskaquestionforme, & their son, Will Bradford
20 May 2002
Mr & Mrs Envelopes, & their son, Brian Bradford
20 May 2002
Mr & Mrs Lessgits, & their daughter, Hope Bradford
20 May 2002
Mr & Mrs Ority, & their enormous daughter, massive Madge Bradford
20 May 2002
Representing the Lib-Dems, Mr & Mrs Calder-Pratt, & their son, Barnaby Bradford
20 May 2002
...a very, very late arrival - Jeffrey Archer Bradford
20 May 2002
From Newcastle, Mr & Mrs Toother-Euro, & their son, Noah Bradford
20 May 2002
Mr & Mrs Bennettisstephenbyersstillthere, & their son, Gordon Bradford
20 May 2002
'Aye's to the right, 'No's to the left - oh, it's Robin Cook Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Membersbill, & their enlisted son, Private Membersbill Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Taircampbell, & their daughter, Alice - she's a spinster, along with Wal Sack Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Sterwithoutportfolio, & their daughter, Minnie Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Erorder, & their daughter, Audrey, known to us all as 'Aud' Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ The standing member for Epping...put it away Stephen! Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Yewtyspeaker, & their daughter, Deb Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Ticalspin, & their daughter, Polly Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Tonourablefriend, & their daughter, Myra Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Ayinparliament, & their son, Todd Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ It's cabaret time - raise your eyes for that fine trapeze artist Margie Knoll - she can swing either way - with her agent, Morrie Poll, who's a friend of Manny Festo Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Netminister, & their taxi-driving son, 'cabby' Netminister Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ There's that monster Ray Ving, with Lou Neeparty - they get paired so they can go off to conference - they're conference pairs Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Turnoutonrecord, & their daughter, Lois Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Signovermydeadbody, & their son, Ira Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ From Wales, Mr & Mrs Ess, & their son, Rhys Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ The Raldemocrats, & their daughter, Libby, with Filly Buster Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
[ Mr & Mrs Itpoll, & their ornithologist son, 'Eggs' Not broadcast] Bradford
20 May 2002
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Pensioners' Ball

Please welcome that lovely octagenarian couple, Mr & Mrs Cryer, & their father, Barry 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Astairlift, & their son, Stan 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
There's the Saga Khan 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Havemecocoanow, & their son, Kenny 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Mydaywedidntneeddrugstomakeusfeelgoodbutsadlywedonow, & their son, Ian 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
There's Tristan - he's quite old, but his lover is older 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Hadmeglasseswhenicomein, & their son, Wilhelmina 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Sionersrights, & their friends, Mr & Mrs Wewantthemnow, with their daughters - that's Penny Sionersrights & Wendy Wewantthemnow 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
It's cabaret time - top of the bill, Helen Shapiro singing Walk-in Bath To Happiness, Ga-Ga Gabor, & Miss Halliwell (an Old Spice girl) with her three hits - a sort of Gerri hat-trick 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Yacantguesshowoldiam, & their grandmother, Bet 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
All the way from Russia, Mr & Mrs Icalstockings, & their son, Serge - great friends of the Icaltrusses 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Bennettthepriceofwurthersoriginals, & their son, Gordon 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
...the Bonus family - they're all called Daisy. Well every Daisy Bonus! 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Fortifiestheoverforties, & their daughter, Phylis-Ann 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
Mr & Mrs Sertitbutt-Tunorealeffect, & their twin sons, Ike and Justin... 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
...closely followed by Mr & Mrs Tiledisfunction, & their son, Eric 30th Anniversary Special
13 Apr 2002
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Pharmacists' Ball

from Ireland, Mr & Mrs O'Teishampooforlifeless-hair, & their son, Tim Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
Mr & Mrs Pressant, & their aunty, Dee Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
From Saudia Arabia, Sheik Thebottle Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
From Russia, Serge Icalstocking Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
From Poland, Mr & Mrs Causedrowsiness, & their daughter, May Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
Mr & Mrs Agra, & their upstart daughter, Violet Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
Did somebody order a stripper, because there's a miss Tixy Licks in the foyer? Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
For all opera lovers, Placebo Domingo! Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
Oh, there's the actress Anna Dean. Nothing acts faster than Anna Dean Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
Mr & Mrs Bennetthurryupwith-thatpreparationaich, & their son, Gordon Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
Mr & Mrs Bullpiles, & their son, Terry Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
From Wales, Mr & Mrs Dyfed, & their daughter, Sue Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
Mr & Mrs Dom, & their son, Con - he's come with a bunch of mates Sheffield
18 Jun 2001
From Wales, Mr & Mrs Tament, & their son, Owen 02 Oct 1974
The distinguished Irish actor, T.C.P. McEnna 02 Oct 1974
Mr & Mrs O'Vioform, & their hideously bound child, the N. terror O'Vioform 02 Oct 1974
Mr & Mrs Ta, & their momma Ta 02 Oct 1974
From Arabia, Sheik Wellbeforeusing 02 Oct 1974
Mr & Mrs Roids, & their daughter, Emma 02 Oct 1974
Mr & Mrs Tic, & their daughter, Emma 02 Oct 1974
It's cabaret time - Prin the dissolving donkey, known as soluble ass Prin 02 Oct 1974
Also in the cabaret, the crap band Age Kevin Hale
Mr & Mrs Ctus, & their daughter, Lynn Kevin Hale
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Photographers' Ball

Mamma Razzi & her husband, Pappa Razzi 22 Jun 1985
Would you cover you eyes ladies, because in the corner we have the allegedly well-developed Matt Print, who's exposing himself with a quick flash, but I'm positive his enlargements are getting negative results 22 Jun 1985
Mr & Mrs Tellyphotosavalas, & their son, Kodak 22 Jun 1985
Those old chums, Len Scap and Ed Cutoff 22 Jun 1985
Here come the Slades, known as the appallingly boring holiday Slades 22 Jun 1985
Mr & Mrs Aturecamera, & their daughter, Minnie. Like 'er? 22 Jun 1985
Mr & Mrs Chzebirdie, & their son, Watt 22 Jun 1985
Mr & Mrs At-Thecamera, & their son, Luke 22 Jun 1985
What's the weather like outside? Is the snow done? 22 Jun 1985
The Leroids & their daughter, Pol 22 Jun 1985
...there's Sam Bodymoved 22 Jun 1985
The male stripper, flash Bing Wallop 22 Jun 1985
Mr & Mrs Kroom, & their father, Da' 22 Jun 1985
There's the waiter, Ditton. Can we have the wine, Ditton? 22 Jun 1985
It's cabaret time, with some very early pictures of winds - the Black & White Mistral Show, singing Someday My Prince Will Come 22 Jun 1985
Mr & Mrs Danglelens, & their daughter, Yvonne, who's invitation just says Y.Danglelens 22 Jun 1985
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Plumbers' Ball

Mr & Mrs Closet, & their son, Walter 18 Apr 1972
Mr Tern, & his daughter, Sis 18 Apr 1972
Mr & Mrs Paper, & their son, Luo 18 Apr 1972
Mr & Mrs Kingpipes, & their son, Lee 18 Apr 1972
Monsieur Soir, & his son, P. Soir 18 Apr 1972
Mr & Mrs Nal, & their son, Uriah 18 Apr 1972
Mr & Mrs Roof, & their children, Geoffrey - the largest Room, and Luo - the smallest Room 18 Apr 1972
Mr Jeff Ing, & his elderly father who's just been released from prison, the old lag Ing 18 Apr 1972
Mr & Mrs Deringiron, & their Jewish son, Sol Kevin Hale
Mr & Mrs Pipe, & their son, who's a police constable...the copper Pipe Kevin Hale
Mr & Mrs Bend, & their son, Hugh Kevin Hale
Mr & Mrs Leak, with their dog, the springer Leak, and their monkey, Wrench Kevin Hale
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Policemen's Ball

(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Politicians' Ball

Mr & Mrs Norder, & their little girl, Laura 23 Jul 1979
Mrs Thatcher, & her man date 23 Jul 1979
Mr & Mrs Leement, & their father, Pa Leement, and their granny, mother of Pa Leement, with their well-endowed Chinese cousin, Hung Pa Leement 23 Jul 1979
It's amazing who you see at parties - there's Enoch Powell & Black Rod 23 Jul 1979
Here's a group stuck in the doorway - Dick Tator, Des Pot, Ollie Garchy, & his dog, Pluto-Crat, 'Arry Stotle. Oh dear, there's a clash in the doorway - that must be Private Membersbill 23 Jul 1979
Here's an interesting family duo - Norman St-John-Stevas & he wants you all to listen to his Aunt Scouncils grunt 23 Jul 1979
Welcome the Speaker of the House of Commons & his Scottish friend, Wal Sac, with his friend, Scotts Nat 23 Jul 1979
Mr & Mrs Ticalbroadcast, & their daughter, Polly 23 Jul 1979
...and 'working' Madge Ority, and her sister, Min 23 Jul 1979
Senator & Mrs Leespeaking, & their son, Frank Rev. Arnold Page
Governor & Mrs Garchy, & their son, Olly Rev. Arnold Page
Mr & Mrs Secretary, & their long-haired son, furry Ian Secretary 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs The-Exchequer, & their rather dodgy daughter, chancy Laura 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Sterofagricultureandfisheries, & their daughter, Minnie 25 Sep 1974
From Glasgow, Mr & Mrs Sack, & their son, Wal 25 Sep 1974
Mr Partick Entrydebate, & his Pa, Liam 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Tingvoter, & their daughter, Flo 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Tics, & their daughter, Polly 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Chers, & their evil piratical son, Black Ben 25 Sep 1974
From France, the Marquis de Sade, & the party whips 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Festo, & their son, party Manny 25 Sep 1974
From Germany, Herr & Frau Ard, & their son, Hans 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Thehonmemberforeppingnorthshutup, & their son, Will 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Mandering, & their son, Jerry, and their friend, Cybil Service 25 Sep 1974
Ann Archist and Des Pot 25 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Rickywiththefirstresults, & their son, Billy 25 Sep 1974
The Duke & Duchess of Daymotion, & their son, the Earl E. Daymotion Kevin Hale
Mr & Mrs Tonourablefriend, & their daughter, Myra Kevin Hale
Mr & Mrs Ferthehonourablegentlemantotheanswerigavesomemomentsago, & their son, Ira Kevin Hale
Mr & Mrs Seats, & their daughter, Margie Nell 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Tingvoter, & their daughter, Flo 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Trollroll, & their son, Alec 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Enoch Powell, & their unlikely offspring, Black Rod 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Ticalbroadcast, & their parrot who likes a good night out, party Polly 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Sistinfluence, & their son, Mark 13 Mar 1977
It's cabaret time, with that popular Latin-American group, Los Deposit 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Thatcher, & their children, known as the Aye Aye, Thatcher lot 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Ricky, & their son who has popped out and just come back in again, the first return Billy Ricky 13 Mar 1977
From Scotland, Mr & Mrs McCraticvote, & their daughter, Freda 13 Mar 1977
Do I see, standing beside Tony Benn & his elder brother, big Benn, a visitor from Scotland to the debating chamber, Wal Sack? Oh no, it's someone else altogether, it's homosexual Bill, with his Queen's speech 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Right, & their jazz playing theatrical agent, 'Ten Percent' swing Tudor Right 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Oozer, & their bitter unsuccessful candidate son, Paul 13 Mar 1977
Isn't that the MacDonalds over there? They've got their Aunty Nancy with them, and as we all know she's Aunty Devolutionist, and known as 'Govan' Nance of Britain 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Toryvote, & their daughter, Mandy 13 Mar 1977
& on the menu tonight, that cold sea bird that nobody is afraid of - the chill-tern none dreads 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Festo, & their son, Manny 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Sterofthe-Environment, & their daughter, Minnie 13 Mar 1977
Mr & Mrs Teewhip, & their father, Pa Teewhip 13 Mar 1977
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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Publicans' Ball

Mr & Mrs Tonic, & their lovely daughter, Jean-Anne 04 Sep 1974
From London, the Bitter family - that's Alf Bitter, & his meek daughter, mild Ann 04 Sep 1974
Camp 'Arry, and his caustic friend, dry Ginger 04 Sep 1974
From Italy, the Tini family - Mr & Mrs Tini, & their lovable mother, sweet Ma Tini 04 Sep 1974
From Scotland, two very close friends known to their intimates as the gay Gordons, but known to us as Angus Sturabitters, & his very close friend, wee Dram 04 Sep 1974
Also from Scotland, Mr & Mrs Twhisky, & their daughter, Moll 04 Sep 1974
The Port family - Tony Port, amp; his wonderful elderly sister, fine old Ruby 04 Sep 1974
Jack Daniels, & his wife, Cherry Bibi Daniels 04 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Atic, & their son, Titus 04 Sep 1974
From Italy, Sñr & Sñra Achio, & their drunken son...Giovanni 04 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Ralwater, & their daughter, Minnie 04 Sep 1974
From Greece, 'O' - Who's 'O'? - Correct 04 Sep 1974
Those enthusiastic clairvoyants, Mr & Mrs Drysherry, & their medium 04 Sep 1974
From Sweden, Mr & Mrs Tordersplease, & their son, Lars, and bloody Mary 04 Sep 1974
Dan Delion, & his bird, Ock 04 Sep 1974
From Paris, Monsieur & Madame Onrouge, & their son educated in Scotland, Mac Onrouge 04 Sep 1974
Mr & Mrs Neespale, & their son, Watt 04 Sep 1974
(d?) after venue signifies a query regarding the Date of broadcast,
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